But you can never allow yourself to feel anything for a girl. There's no room for emotions in this business. You can't have women working for you when...you have feelings.I learned how to switch off my feelings at an early age. As a pimp you have to rule, know it all, deal with everything, make sure nothing can ever hurt you. And the girl has to come home with the money, or else she's got a problem.The women were never more than merchandise to me. They were things, objects. I said to myself: 'If. .As days passed we both got close we talked about adult stuff and all.. We both wanted each other so badly but we didn’t express it.One night.. This were our conversationShe ‘He won’t be home tonight..’Me ‘hmm.. Do you have anything in mind?’She ‘No’Me ‘shall I drop by for a late night coffee :P’She ‘there’s no milk’Me ‘I actually prefer dark coffee ;)’She ‘I don’t have coffee powder also :(‘Me ‘I’ll get it and prepare’She ‘ok come to the terrace at 10’Since my parents were early sleepers. ”I pulled her into my arms and she mashed her body against me and we kissed deeply, our tongues tangling with each other.“I’ll miss you,” Melanie said when we broke the kiss.“I’ll miss you, too! And for the rest of your life, those kisses only come from Pete! Do you hear me, Melanie Marie Spencer?”“Yes, Steve!” she said brightly.Pete had a huge grin on his face and clapped me on the back.Jennifer led me into her house and up the stairs. We quickly undressed and got into her bed. We made slow,. It would be what he would call her when they were alone. Hannah was so filled with joy to know he was her 'lover'. It gave her such contentment to be considered a grownup by her lover, and to be his secret wife. She knew she would have to share him as Mommy did, but that even increased her status in her mind. She was loaning him out to others. She wasn't part of the others anymore. She was just like Mommy. Could a man have two wives?Years later, Hannah would realize that she was going through.
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