She looked at the charring in the garage and made sympathetic noises, but I was keen to get on. I dragged her out, then froze. "Where's the bedroom? I...can't remember."She led me towards one door, I'd have guessed was one bedroom, saying, "How conventional of you. But as you say, boring, but comfortable." I was trying to pick up any clue as to our relationship, so far I got the idea I was a randy old goat and she was a nymphomaniac. This was even better than my fantasies.In the bedroom, I saw. They'd both lived alone for so many years and neither of them was in the first bloom of youth. Perhaps, it was a step too far that they should share more than a bed on a permanent basis."Should we get married?" Doris once asked Diane."Although the Church of England is comparatively liberal on gay relationships and believes in the sanctity of marriage," the vicar answered, "I'm not sure that even this far into the twenty-first century the church has progressed quite as far as to unreservedly. ‘It goes against the original parameters of what we originally agreed to. He still has no plans to leave his wife, but he believes I’m exclusive to him. She took a deep sigh, lifted her head to look at me and said, ‘I have feelings for you, all of them unrequited. And I feel bad keeping you a secret from him.’ Her face fell like the sunlight that was fading she was staring at outside of the window. I had to break the silence by asking, ‘Does he fuck like me?’ She cracked half a smile and half a. "What?" This was news to me."We're going camping with you," she repeated, without a change in her intonation. She'd reached the stage where any adult she met was an idiot studying to be a moron — and flunking the course. Clearly, she was unimpressed with the prospect of camping with Uncle George."Ginny," I called to my sister, who by now had gathered her youngest spawn by the hand and was steering her to my door, "nice to see you. What's all this about?" I need some help." Mentally, I ran.
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